Fear Less, Learn Faster

Alexander Lyadov
2 min readJun 11, 2024

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Max Waugh

If grapplers are too aggressive, training loses its meaning. Chaos increases the risk of injury. Fighting becomes conservative. As a result, learning slows down. Mastery doesn’t grow.

In some pairs, aggression is off the charts. Either the desire to win is too strong, or the prospect of losing is unbearable.

In such cases, I suggest to my opponent: “Let’s make it harder. In addition to trying to win, you have to tap out twice. If you don’t manage to tap out, you lose.”

The quality of the fight changes drastically. The fear of losing disappears. The match becomes dynamic, inventive, and exciting. We want to experiment. We help each other grow.

This is how paradoxical intention works. This is Viktor Frankl’s method of logotherapy. It cures phobias through the attitude: “You must desire with all your heart what you fear most.”

This method works in psychotherapy, sports, and business. When faced with something scary or challenging, set a goal: “I must make a specific number of mistakes.”

You’ll see — getting there will be easier and more fun.

Sincerely yours,

-Alexander

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Alexander Lyadov

As a business therapist, I help tech founders increase the value of their business by unlocking the potential of their personality.